Dear Blackberry/Research In Motion,

The thrill is gone. Our relationship needs serious therapy to repair the damage or I suspect we will be getting divorced soon.  I discovered Blackberry in 2006 when I instantly fell in love with the Pearl (8100). My very first smartphone!! You had me at hello.  Soon a few friends and family members joined the club and they too were wooed by its charms…. After we all learned about Blackberry Messenger it was a match made in heaven.

Those who know me best KNOW that I am a gadget obsessed girl and after my 2 year love affair with the Pearl I was ready for something new… so I moved on to the Curve… unfortunately AT&T had a few connectivity issues in the building where I worked so our affair was destined to only be a brief fling. Before the end of my 30 day trial I was forced to return the Curve to the store and take my services to Sprint. So back to the Pearl I went and this time I had a newer model (8130 yay!). Also around this time my job decided they needed to be able to contact me whenever, so they issued me a 7100t and later upgraded me to a 8703e. Two Blackberry devices at once I was in BB paradise.

Once again for about another year all was well until one night my phone kinda spazzed on me and started snapping photos on its own at 2 a.m.  After much effort I was able to stop it by a battery pull and a full shutdown. The next day however before I knew it I had 300 photos of the inside of my purse!!!

I was a year into my contract and as a preferred customer I could upgrade AND I had a $150 credit! Oh Joy what would I choose to be my next BB?! If I was going to stay with Sprint my only choices were the Curve (blah), 8703b (no), or the Pearl (been there done that). What was a girl to do??? I did what any self-respecting Blackberry fanatic would do… I emailed the CEO of Sprint, Dan Hesse. I laid bare my love for Blackberry and asked when, if ever Sprint would have any newer devices. Their website was loaded with HTC, Samsung, Motorola, etc but they only had 3 Blackberries when AT&T at the time had 8 different models. Verizon Wireless and T-mobile were not far behind with 6 or 7 devices. I couldn’t understand why I was being deprived!!!  I was reading and Boy Genius Report religiously and there seemed to be no relief in sight… not as long as I was a Sprint customer that is….

The newest BB on the scene was the Blackberry Bold 9000. I watched the commercials longingly, but I had no idea how I’d be able to own that phone at least not while being a Sprint customer. Well thanks to my good ole Pearl deciding to take a trip to Crazytown in the middle of the night that sealed the deal. *Cue Kelly Rowland’s Motivation* I headed over to AT&T to rekindle our relationship. A short while later I had my new Precious in my hand.  Soon a whole new world opened up… I could talk and text (something that was spotty at best with Sprint). Not only was I talking and texting I could also surf the web AND to my all time favorite thing and that was chat on my BBM!!!!!

Thank the Lord for 1 year upgrades because the following year I was able to get the Bold 9700 and this year I upgraded to the Torch. I’ve really enjoyed the updates that come from having OS 6. I can definitely say the company is making a step in the right direction BUT (I know and it pains me to say this) RIM is woefully behind.  For awhile it seems every day on Twitter there were Team Iphone vs Team BB battles.  Honestly, I wasn’t moved or bothered by the insults and I definitely couldn’t understand why adults were engaging in my phone is better than your phone conversations (and no I am not saying this because I have a BB). I just feel like you like what you like and that’s it. I don’t knock the iphone or Apple, because I own 2 ipods so I am definitely NOT hating on Steve Jobs. I love my Blackberry because I love BBM, the calendar/scheduling and email integration. I like knowing that when someone sends me an email as soon as they hit send it is right there in my face. I tend to get annoyed when folks text/call and say hey I sent you an email… ummm ma’am or sir I am looking at it right now. If you were going to call you might as well have just told me whatever it was you emailed… but I digress… Here’s what I don’t love at the moment.. My beloved Blackberry Torch that is ONLY 6 months old lately has been being very half-assed. My trackpad will suddenly decide that it doesn’t want to work no matter how hard I press it.. yes I know I have a touch screen, but I am kinda attached to my trackpad dammit! So this issue usually requires a hard reset once or twice in order for the pad to start working again. For the last 2 weeks or more my phone will shut down for no apparent reason. The screen fades to black and when I tap a key it will pop up only to shut off and fully reset. I could call my wireless provider, BUT what can they do really… other than send me another phone… this would be ideal if they were not going to send me a refurb! I am sorry I am a bit of a gadget snob and honestly I don’t want someone else’s raggedy phone the company techs have tinkered around with and repackaged for some poor schmuck like me.

Sigh! I feel like My trusty BB and I have reached the crossroads in our relationship and I cannot really say what’s going to happen. Sure RIM is promising us big things with OS 7, BUT I want to know if it’s really going to be a big change? Last year they said OS 6 was going to be the game changer, while I have enjoyed the updates it wasn’t anything to write home to Aunt Jane about as my mother would say. I’m no longer wowed. I don’t feel like my voice is being heard. I am a member of the Blackberry Market Research panel AND I test out new applications in Blackberry Beta Zone, but it seems like they aren’t paying attention or at least asking the right questions.

So my dear RIM I’ve said all this to say you’ve gotten complacent. You lack focus. You are not giving me the same level excitement you did 5 years ago. I’ve been loyal (if you’ve been paying attention I’ve owned/used 8 Blacberry devices) and now I want something in return. I have about 6 months until its upgrade time again and already my eye has begun to wander.  Slowly, but surely all of my friends are jumping ship and while I still have a significant number of BBM contacts A LOT of the people I speak to daily are no longer available for me to PING! I know I am just one person in a sea of many customers, but I am sure I am not alone.  I fear if I leave I’ll never come back….

The Truth About Bee… a few little known facts about me

I initially planned to share 25 tidbits about myself, but this is harder than it looks!!! My mind is like a million miles away today and I am super sleepy so that probably doesn’t do a thing to help the situation.


I am super shy—yeah I know it doesn’t add up but it is so true

In my head I am a mean girl—if I ever start to say half the stuff I think people would be shocked.

I am a lightweight prude—while I am not nun material some things/behaviors are and have always been a no-no for me.

I do not like the smell of bananas – I haven’t eaten one in over 20 years.

I have 5 siblings. I only have one parent in common with each of them. 1-mom 4-dad

I lived in the State of Georgia for 30 years before living in another one.

I LOVE books!

I am terrified of speaking in public. It causes major anxiety. Just the thought of it rattles me.

I try to spin everything into something positive it doesn’t always work, but I will certainly try to find the bright side.

I think I am a borderline hypochondriac.

I am NOT a morning person. I hate my alarm with the intensity of 1000 suns!

I’m addicted to electronics – ok that’s not much of a secret



These Are My Confessions…..or I Get So Emotional Baby!



I have difficulty expressing my emotions verbally…. This may come as a surprise to those who know me or maybe not. I have been affectionately dubbed “The Card Lady” by my girlfriend D because of my uncanny ability to find just the right card for every occasion. I love cards quite simply because they usually are able to convey whatever emotion I am feeling at the time perfectly without me having to say the words out loud. I am not sure at what point in my life emotions became such a big scary thing for me, perhaps they have always been… just like my fear of public speaking.

Talking about how I feel makes me self-conscious and usually I tend to act all weird and clam up. I’ve been blessed with a great bunch of girlfriends and sorors all of whom are able to express themselves so beautifully and it is something I envy. Take my newest twin/soulmate/soror Charm I just think she is awesome-sauce and every time we chat when we get off the phone she tells me “love you B-Rabbit.”  Now some would think it would be the easiest thing in the world for me to say love you too Charmeezy cause I do, buuuuuuuuuuut saying I love you makes me all crazy and uneasy. Yes, people I know I am lightweight insane. Does this stem from growing up in a household where I don’t remember hearing it often or at all? Perhaps… or it could be a hang up that I acquired all on my own.

Let’s add some more strangeness to the pot shall we? Now while I don’t like talking about my feelings and whatnot I am a HUGE crier and when I say huge I mean huge. Television shows, commercials, certain gospel songs, proposals, sappy movies….hell even happy movies make me cry. Recently, I was watching Coming Home on Lifetime and there was one particular story that touched me, and as I watched tears silently streamed down my face. The hubs was on the other couch watching too soooo I was also trying to wipe them on my t-shirt hoping he wouldn’t see, but wouldn’t you know it he caught me. BUSTED!!!!! He looks over at me and says “Are you crying?! You are such an emotional wreck.”  He gets such joy from teasing me.

Lately the crying has been a tad bit more than normal. I cry a lot, but never much as I have been in the past couple months maybe even the past year. This is starting to freak me out. I have no idea where it’s coming from and I would very much like for it to stop, because people are going to think I am a nutcase. I saw a really cute youtube video one day…cried. Heard a song on the radio I liked…cried. Heard some really good news….you guess it. Now the way I am describing it may sound to you just like the way I said I normally am, but these mutant tears are on another level. I mean if I was an actress I could probably cry my ass off right now for a scene with no prompting/help/artificial tears, because these bad boys come with absolutely no warning. It is driving me insane!!!!!

I mentioned it to my primary physician a few months ago and she simply said she didn’t think I needed a prescription and that was about it. Well I saw her again today and I asked her if she would check my hormone levels since I am still a crybaby. Thankfully she said yes, so hopefully I will have my results soon and I can go from there. The only downside to this is, if it’s not my birth control making me cry like my name is John Boehner or Jim Bakker then I don’t know what the heck I am going to do!


What’s That I Smell? Why I Do Believe It’s a Steaming Pile Of BS!!!!

I should start this off by saying I am in no way a biblical scholar nor am I trying to comment on a person’s salvation/relationship with God, but someone just made a proposition that is as unbelievable as it is hard to ignore.

A man, J, who has recently started attending church again and is “trying to get his life right” is dating a like-minded individual.  J’s lady friend has stated that she does not want to have sex until she is married. J says he is trying to get right spiritually but he isn’t there yet so he decides that since he’s not there it is ok for him to text a woman and proposes that she has sex with him once a week because he’s not ready to give that up just yet.

So maybe it’s just me, because I know some times my moral compass tends to end up on high, but that just seems like all kinds of wrong.  Who does that???? I know we are supposed to go to God , confess our sins and ask for forgiveness, but who in the heck just says I am not only going to NOT do what I am supposed to do I am not even going to try to do the right thing?

I also think the person on the receiving end of the proposal should be a bit offended, but once again that is just me.  My house is definitely one of a see-through nature so I won’t be slinging any rocks any time soon, but this entire situation has me puzzle and honestly I am done trying to understand it because I know his logic and mine are quite different and oftentimes people’s motives are unclear even with an explanation.  So I said all of that to say on this one I call BULLSHIT. You can’t un-ring the bell but let’s slowly back away from it shall we?

Christmas Eve Randoms…

Countdown to Christmas….

The girl is extra excited she’s been thinking every day is Christmas since last Saturday.

I am hella sleepy, but I know I have to go play Santa so no sleep any time soon.

Why are people so against letting kids believe in Santa? I’ve seen quite a few people complaining or criticizing those of us who allow our children to have a little bit of magic and innocence in their lives. To each his own, but don’t try to tell me how or what to do with my children…they have plenty of time to know about grown-up stuff.

Hard to believe its almost a new year…. 2010 breezed by.

The family will be moving again some time next year we are patiently waiting for our next duty station assignment.

My husband is forcing me to drink Riesling… it is making me sleepy…

I can’t wait to see my babies faces in the morning… they are going to be sooo excited.

Merry Christmas!!!

Saturday Night Ramblings

I want the Blackberry Torch like NOW….. I can’t upgrade till Feb *sad face*

My dad gave me a new camera… I love it. It takes vivid pics.

I found out I have allergies…. the allergy tests suck.. my poor arms are bruised. I am allergic to indoor/outdoor mold & mildew, dust mites, and dog dander. I will be starting the desensitization process next month. Yipee!

I started physical therapy last week because I have chondromalacia (runner’s knee). Friday I think the therapist tried to kill me a little bit. I am sore!

Every Saturday night that I find myself up late I end up watching Lockup and I don’t know why! These guys are scary!

Do people really buy products like Wonder File and Yonanas?

This book I am reading is only mildly interesting. I kinda want to stop reading and pick up one of my James Patterson novels but I only have about 100 pages to go.

I love my BBM Book Club we are usually soooo off topic but I don’t mind because they are a funny bunch.

I was considering cutting my hair, but I think I’ve changed my mind for now.

My daughter starts Kindergarten next week. She’s growing up. My son transitioned to a toddler bed this week. Both of my babies are growing up. Time is flying by!

I still want the Blackberry Torch…. Yes I know I said that already but it bears repeating.