I am a big ol’ introvert. Social gatherings tend to drain me and I avoid them if I can, but I have two coming up that cannot be missed. This is going to be interesting to say the least. Coming up first we are going to the beach with my in-laws 6 adults and 6 children then the following weekend we are going to a reunion with my side of the family and I don’t even have a head count on that one. It usually takes me a few days after attending an event/gathering to recharge and just feel “normal” again and I suspect after two weekends of back to back activities I am going to be about as useful as a wet piece of notebook paper.
The prospect of getting away is exciting and I know the kids are going to have a blast, but I am just wondering how to deal and keep myself from shutting down because of over-stimulation…. seeing that written out is so first world problem-ish here I am worried about how to handle being on vacation when some people would kill to go on a vacation… I guess that kind of puts it in perspective, but I know myself so this feels like a hot mess waiting to happen. I am going to do my best to follow my own advice and find the silver lining and try to enjoy myself. Let us pray….LOL!!!
Today is one of those days that I feel like I am at my wits end and this feeling only started AFTER I picked up my kids. The girl and I went to the grocery store before heading to the daycare to pick up the boy and she was all over the place! She was walking off, picking up huge jars of pickles and of course being mouthy as usual! I really wanted to give her a good old fashion beat down, but I refrained from being that parent who acts a damn fool in public. Fast forward a few minutes we have the boy and are at home, as soon as we hit the door he starts whining which is like nails on a chalkboard. Instead of asking for a cup of milk like a normal person because he can talk he thinks he’s better served by whining. His whine is this weird shaky billy goat sounding noise and it sends me every. single. time.
I need a break and its coming soon! My mom is going to keep the kids for the summer and perhaps this makes me a bad mother for admitting this BUUUUUT I am counting down the days until they leave! I need a little freedom and time to myself to just breathe! One of my girlfriends always says that she admires me and she thinks I am a great mom, but right now I definitely don’t feel like one. I feel like an overwhelmed, highly stressed-out basket case! Whoever said God has a sense of humor was NOT lying!!! How else would I, the some times introvert, have a daughter who is super hyper, outgoing and talkative???
I don’t know what I will do with all of this free time but I am so anxious to have it!!! The knowledge that I can come and go as I please, not having to figure out who can watch them while I do the simplest things sounds so appealing. God bless my mother, for right now she is a SAINT!!!!